Mythical Holiday Eve 2.0

I'm beginning to think that school would be much more efficient if every day were senior skip day. We've already had one. Perhaps there will be two. Why not one hundred and eighty?

Benefits:

We never bond. I can't be hurt by your insensitive comments.

You cannot fail what was never assigned to you.

There is safety in numbers. We can't fail all of you.

Downside:

We never bond. I can't hurt you with my insensitive comments.

You never learn the secret we all learn at graduation when the presenter of the diploma whispers it in your ear, and so you can never be part of the Illuminati.

You've waited all of your life to be an apex bully. Now you will have to yell at strangers in coffee shops instead.

Either way I know my kids will never abandon me. After all, I spent all evening baking them cookies. No one with a soul could ignore that.