B Day November 1

Freshman Study Hall: They have discovered the Petraitometer. Like the apes in 2001 A Space Odyssey they tentatively approached the board where the coded rating system of my classes had been all year. One by one they extended their undersized hands towards the board and asked what the rating system meant. "Is it a good thing that we are in the negative category?" When they learned the truth they screeched like animals and protested with animal energy. I have been waiting for this as it is a step towards sentience.

U.S. History General: They continue to be one of the only classes that actually pay attention to my lessons and so I will continue to shower them with the soft warmth of my affection. Carry on my little doves for you will always find a home in the nest of U.S. History.

U.S. History Honors: During this hour I found out I won the costume contest. With the same costume I have been wearing every year for 32 years. I got a gift card, and the best part is I didn't even enter the contest in the first place. It just goes to show that after all of these years my efforts of caring for my students, offering them shelter in crisis, creating unique lessons and listening to them in all of their angst and passionate fear I have been recognized for wearing a cow onesie. I am blessed. Also we we researched the Robber Barons, specifically Andrew Carnegie, Pullman, John D. Rockefeller, Cornelius Vanderbilt, and JP Morgan. If I remember correctly everyone was so excited they clapped wildly and carried me over their heads like the hero the governor says I am while he is also telling all who will listen that I'm spreading Marxism and gender propaganda. It's all coming together.